It's nearly ten at night. Amay pulls into the parking lot. The security guard salutes him respectfully as the swanky new Punch zooms under the neon lights. Reciprocating with a brief smile and a nod, Amay heads towards the lift and hits the button.
Stepping out into the corridor, the warm lights and the soft music soothe his frayed nerves. His restless fingers buzz the doorbell bell several times, but no response. ‘Arzoo is not answering the door, strange…, where can she be?’
After knocking several times, he loses patience, unlocks the door with the duplicate keys and enters the room. An eerie silence prevails punctuated by the humming of the refrigerator. In the pitch dark, he can barely make out the contours of the furniture in the drawing room. Switching on the lights, he spends a few seconds to soak in the surroundings.
Confirmed that Arzoo is not at home, Amay starts dialing her number. Already pissed off with her sudden absence, he gets further irritated on finding the phone switched off. After a couple of attempts, he gives up.
‘Damn it, how can she be so irresponsible, where’s she gone…’ Amay stares at his mobile screen, vacant. Running his fingers through the curly hair, he feels anger welling up within him as he tries to figure out his next step.
‘Muskan must still be awake, let’s see if she has any idea…’
“Hello, you are already missing me, it’s not even an hour since you left…”, the husky voice with a faint chuckle stirs Amay, as always.
Controlling his emotions, he says,” Yaar, Arzoo is not at home and her phone is switched off…can’t understand what might have happened...”.
Sensing the tension in Amay’s voice irks Muskan, but she manages to appear concerned. “Oh, that’s weird, how about checking with her friends or parents?”
“Well…she has never done this earlier. If she makes any plan, she shares it with me, so I am wondering. In fact, I am getting scared now…is she safe?”
“Hmm…I think, you first check out with the possible people; if that doesn’t work, you may need to inform the police.”
The word “police” unnerves Amay. Disconnecting the phone, he again tries Arzoo’s number, but with no luck. ‘Come on Arzoo, please pick up the phone, where are you…’, Amay now feels a sense of helplessness creeping into him.
‘Should I call her Dad? He might panic in case she is not there. Also, I haven’t spoken to him since last Diwali…. allowing his emotions to battle out for some time, finally, prudence prevails, and he makes the call. After exchanging a few pleasantries, Amay realizes Arzoo is not there either.
Running out of ideas, Amay decides to wait; hoping that Arzoo might return the next morning.
Arzoo does not show up the next day. Reluctantly, Amay lodges a missing person report with the nearest police station. The police officer cracks jokes that he must enjoy his new-found bachelorhood. His callousness peeves Amay, but he starts questioning himself.
‘Am I really sad? Or I feel relieved that Arzoo is not there…now I don’t need to feel guilty about my relationship with Muskan.’ The thoughts are deeply embarrassing but Amay can't brush them aside. Indeed, his marriage with Arzoo has not been working. Looking back, he tries to figure out whether it was his growing non-compatibility with Arzoo that drove him towards Muskan or his increasing proximity with Muskan acted as the wet blanket in his marital relationship.
The bottom line is that Muskan is now kebab mein haddi. As an inevitable outcome, Amay has been entangled in frequent fights with Arzoo with growing bitterness. While he cannot place his finger on the exact reason for discord, he has felt a steady loss of love and respect over time. Eventually, the differences are now irreconcilable.
Lost in thoughts, Amay returns home, hoping that Arzoo might have returned. But the house remains empty, uncomfortably silent. Having reached a dead end, Amay decides to inform Arzoo’s parents, reluctantly. Shortly afterwards, there is a steady trickle of friends and relatives at home. They engage in animated discussions guessing the possible reasons for her sudden disappearance, probing Amay with not-so-pleasant questions. Her in-laws are visibly distressed, unable to figure out how to deal with the sudden turn of events. Amay feels drained.
The police continue with the search, scouting all possible places – hospitals, morgues etc. but it seems Arzoo has just vanished into thin air. Even her office colleagues are unable to help because Arzoo had already left that place about a month ago.
Gradually, the investigation reveals that she had been planning the move for several months. Her best friend Kajal too confirms that Arzoo was making up her mind but kept her exact move a closely guarded secret. In other words, she never wanted anyone to track her down. Instead, she deliberately wanted to go into incognito mode.
Although unsure, Amay presumes that his increasing proximity to Muskan and his growing apathy towards Arzoo might have prompted her to take the extreme step. Initially what starts as a hunch, gradually turns into his belief as the days morph into weeks with the police clueless about Arzoo’s whereabouts. Also, their investigation of Amay, his neighbours, friends and family reveals the extramarital affair, so they too draw the same conclusion behind Arzoo’s reason for the sudden disappearance. The case closes, unsolved.
Arzoo’s parents struggle with the loss - their health deteriorating as they continue waiting for her, indefinitely…
For Amay, life limps back to normal, but it is not the same any more. As he tries to adapt to life minus Arzoo, Muskan pushes him harder to start their much-awaited live-in relationship. They had been planning it for several months and Amay had indirectly hinted at Arzoo about his plans to move out.
Surprisingly, however, now that the situation is ripe for him to move to Muskan’s place, there is something deep down within him that stops him. Consequently, multiple arguments erupt with Muskan to the extent that she has started questioning his intent but Amay feels he has lost a part of himself and is incomplete without it. ‘Strange, I never felt this vacuum when I planned to leave Arzoo, but now that emptiness engulfs me.’ Amay tries to fathom his own feelings and behaviour, but the numbness within just sits there, refusing to budge.
Finally, unable to enrol Amay despite repeated attempts over several months, Muskan decides to call off the relationship. Amay is left all alone to deal with life riddled with memories of the time spent with Arzoo, the dreams they shared, and the bitterness with which they parted ways, albeit unplanned and unexpected.
It's been eighteen years seven months since that fateful day. Riddled by health challenges and setbacks in professional life, life has not been easy for Amay since Arzoo left him. But finally, God has been merciful, as if to prove that He has not given up on him.
Thanking God for the blessings, Amay fondly looks at Maya’s photo on the mobile screen clicked a few hours ago at a cosy café to celebrate her eighteenth birthday. The auburn curls can’t be missed.
Today also marks the celebration of his fatherhood revealed by the letter that Maya carried to his office today. Arzoo has been waiting all these years to disclose her father’s identity till she turned an adult and decided if she wanted to meet her father.
